i know its almost 6am. I'm like so addicted to this korean drama. I don't even fucking know why all of a sudden i'm into korean dramas. weirdo. hm, I was about to share something this morning. This sudden feeling I have. I feel like letting it out. so here is the only place where I'm comfortable sharing it. So, my exam is almost over. One more paper left. During these days, it's been quite a rough day. So many things I had in mind, especially the thought of that guy. I know. I can't stop talking about him am I? as days are almost closer to the end of semester, I have this thought, " what would happen to us after this? maybe we would both go separate ways for good and start getting busy with our lives? " aku igt, this one time, once kawan die pernah mentioned " apa akan jadi dgn korang lepas nh? Die dah habis belajar, and kau masih dkt situ..." well, something like that. yeah, aku tgh fikir lah jugak nh. Sometimes, i feel like, there's this little tiny chances that we're going to be just fine, but 99.99% of my consciousness says, there will be no 'us'. And come to think of it, mungkin selama harinh, he wasn't actually talking about me. Maybe it was someone else. Someone that he wanted. Someone that can make him really happy, and maybe, the person isn't me. Reading whatever he posts, the first two seconds I was smiling, and then, I realized that it wasn't meant for me. Perasan lebih, kan? After all, life is no fairy tale or not like any of these korean dramas. This is the real deal. I'm, just...nothing. There's no way that there's one guy who would run towards me and hugs me or even remembering the memories yang kita dah lalui atau pun, text me " I love you " to make sure that I know that he wont leave, big time. Bullshit lah semua tuh! It's time I face reality. Maybe I can never forget, tapi aku akan senyum setiap kali aku teringat semua kenangan2 tuh. If he's happy with the person that makes him happy, I'll be happy for him too. Because you're the reason I smile back then. And I'm glad that knowing you wasn't my biggest mistake, at all. :)

Fighting, R.A!

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