Should I go through this again?

for shashonnn ONLY :) :

Adam Jamil
January 17 at 1:05am
the moody situation that we been through please forgiiiiiiiiiiiivvvvvvvveeeeee me shashon and i admit im full of goofing around and never think about your feelings. i swear to be more careful next time around. You are my first priority right nowwwww ! nothing else ! and i felt very awful to make you angry ! please please and please be gila gila back for meeee ! im glad that you answered my calls and to hear your voice is such a relief.

Music video by K-Ci & JoJo performing All My Life. (C) 1998 Geffen Records

I don't know where's the flaws between us. After the day we met, you didn't text me and when I'd text you, you said you were busy with your friends. So what's the point you mentioned " You are my first priority right now. "? And there comes a time when I need you the most. When I feel like breaking down, when I feel like crying, I need you here with me even if you can't drive all the way just to see me or whatever. I just wanna feel that you are here. :'( Then like just now, we were texting and I asked you " Eh adam, pagois tuh ape? " , " Hahaha mane u tahu pagois ? U stalk eyh ? Haha susah nak terang " , " Hehe :p alahh cptlah cptlah! " , " Haha klau i ckp klcc dekat pagois maknenya klcc jauh gila. Paham ? " , " Ohh. Okay paham :) " , " Haha asal u tye ? " , " Saje nak taw. Hehe " , " Bgtaw ah ? " , " Alahh. I saje nk taw. Tuh jea " , " Dh tak nak ckp dgn u dh klau u tak bgtau." , " :'( " , " Baek bgtau! " , " I dah ckpkan i saje nk taw " , " Tiba2 u tnye pastu i takde ckp pagois smlm " , " Hmm, i tye jea :( " , " Hrmm okay " , " Hmm. Takpelah. U mcm taknak ckp dgn i. Bye. " , " U tak bgtaw i mane u tahu perkataan tu sape suruh. Bye " , " Don't talk to me. I don't need you " , " I pening lah dgn u ni, kejap marah dgn kwn u pastu dgn i. Lantak u lahh nk buat ape! I nk pg club mlm ni. "

So, I know it may seemed ' remeh-temeh ' but once a guy talks to you this way, it breaks your whole heart. I don't know. Maybe seeing me made you this way. Maybe bec
ause you were expecting a ' something ' girl but what you see on that day was... nothing?

But that's okay. Since I've known you, I've never been so weak. You are my biggest weakness still you are my strongest strength. Whenever you left me like this, I feel so weak. I feel like there's no one in this world that I need the most other than you. I've been in this situation so many times, Adam. And what I expect from you is a different way of treating me but I guess it will still be the same like the others. I'm sorry but honestly, you're pushing me one step back from you. I always wanted to tell you this, but I know I won't get the chance. I love you :')

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